Transparency
Peter Knox sparked this off with his own monologue on transparency:
“This is my website. If you don’t want to hire me for this transparency, maybe I don’t want to work for you. If you don’t want to date me for this exposure, maybe I don’t want to date you … anonymous just isn’t for me – I want you to know me and accept me and to support me.” (Peter Knox via Ilyana)
I love to express who I am and what I think. I don’t know if it’s out of attention, a need to be liked, a need to be praised, or something else. I don’t try to hide anything for fear of embarrassment or rejection. I don’t try to act differently with one group or another because then I’m being selective. Besides, it’s hard to juggle so many different “images” sometimes.
I live life transparently so that I connect as a single person.
Honesty
I also love being honest about things because only then do I really start to communicate with people:
“That’s one thing I’ve noticed: When I am radically honest, people become radically honest themselves. I feel my resentment fade away. I like this guy. We have a good meeting.” (A. J. Jacobs)
And when you start to honestly communicate with people you build strong relationships. I enjoy what people have to say to me when they know I’m receptive. I appreciate those willing to have conversations in the comments (or by email or some other means) and perhaps I reciprocate by being honest.
I live life honestly in order to really connect with people.
So what?
I act and think the same online as I do with my friends from school, with people at work and so on. I feel that combining honesty and transparency create genuinity (boy, I do think quite highly of myself!). But seriously, I feel as if my life is so much easier (as if it were tough?) and so much more enjoyable this way.
This quote is what I’m trying to explain.. but in a much better way: “If you tell the truth you don’t have to remember anything.” -Mark Twain
Is this the best way?
Obviously this lifestyle isn’t for everyone. It seems to work alright for me: I don’t have to act differently, I don’t have to be selective with my words, I don’t have to remember what I can and can’t show people on Facebook. It’s all out there and I’m receptive to anyone who comes along with praise, criticism and so on. It also allows me to be me.
Does this make sense? What’s the other side to all this?
Resources:
Transparency by Peter Knox – Defining one’s own need to be transparent.
I Think You’re Fat by A.J. Jacobs. Esquire. – An experiment in Radical Honesty
Haven’t stopped by the site in a while, everything looks great
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Keep up the good work buddy.
I meant to say something about this post–got sidelined.
I completely agree with you here. I don’t think everyone should know everything that’s going on in my life–but to me that’s not really what this is talking about.
To me it’s about having a clear idea of who you want to be and striving to be that person 100% of the time. To me it creates a more authentic sense of who I am and where I want to go.
If everything I’m doing is aligned towards the same goals and I’m not conflicting within myself–I find my goals much easier to accomplish.
Of course there are always going to be nay-sayers, but I’ve learned there will be critics of anything you do–even when you are wildly successful.
Thanks for stopping in Brad, I’d go check out your blog but I’m pretty certain it’s been a while since you’ve last posted.
I like your comment, I’d change ‘even when you are wildly successful’ to ‘especially when…’.
sir – your website is starting to get more and more intense and elaborate and while the aesthetic whore in me loves looking at it, you will soon leave me far, far away in the dust!
i just got back from vacation and am still recovering (yes, still). i can’t wait to catch on your writing. starting with this post, which was awesome
Just wait until I make the color scheme fit devinreams.com (black and green). Mmmmm. Thanks, Damsel.
You know, I was reading some article the other day (can’t remember where, sorry) that basically stated that this generation and the upcoming generations thrive on transparency. It’s refreshing in a way. There’s no pretense. No hiding, although I’m sure folks don’t reveal _everything_, which is certainly okay.
Do you remember our parents who were hush hush about finances? No more. Now we’ve got sites that thrive off of public personal financial information, as well as any other personal information that folks are willing to give away.
You have to be careful about it to some extent though. My current employer read my whole blog during my interview process. If I would have had anything questionable I might not have been hired. Then again, maybe my transparency _is_ what got me hired. Who knows…
That’s a cool example, Dustin. I hardly mind if my employer reads; as mentioned, I wouldn’t want to work there if this was an issue.